Shitty Stories

This isn’t really a shit story, only a fart story. We used to play pick-up basketball in a gym on Tuesday evenings. It was one of those elementary school gyms, very small, and not well ventilated, but it was in the fall, so it really didn’t matter, or so I thought. During the first game, [...]

I had the stomach flu this last year. Not the ferocious on-your-deathbed kind, but the one that gives it to you out both ends for the first 24 hours. I was living with my boyfriend of 3 years at the time and he was convinced after the explosions subsided that all I had been afflicted [...]

Some time ago my new wife and I were at Home Depot…in the lumber section, actually. I was recently out of college and hadn’t aclimated to wearing underwear everyday, yet. This particular day I was wearing a pair of loose fitting gym shorts and no underwear. I hadn’t been feeling great either…a little upset stomach, [...]

Working for a painting contractor several years ago, the boss left two of us to work in a newly-constructed house all day, every day, for about 2 weeks, while he did a job a few miles away. We had no vehicle, and the nearest store was about 2 miles down the road. There was a [...]

My boyfriend and I planned to take a drive down to spend the day at a state park. Naturally, for breakfast, we had an excuse to eat the yummy and unhealthy fast food breakfast sandwiches while on the road. We had planned to take the interstate down to the park and take state routes, aka [...]

My uncle use to own a bike shop and there was a young kid that use to come in often to just hang out and talk about bikes. One day he ran into the store at full sprint, pushed passed a customer and went right to the bathroom. I was waiting patiently for him to [...]

I was riding an overnight ferry in Greece a couple summers ago with a large group, mostly made up of flaky girls. Since we were stuck on the ferry till morning with nothing to do most of the group decided to get tomorrow’s showering out of the way tonight. A particular clique of the dumb [...]

I was on the 4th hole of a beautiful golf course. I had to walk out to the other side of the fairway because it had been raining and it was cart path rule only. As I began to walk back to the cart after hitting my shot, I felt the rumbling of my stomach. [...]

I was at my friend’s birthday party and we were playing football. In the course of the game I went to tackle someone and felt a strong pain brewing in my gut. I farted a few times and the pain seemed to subdue……temporarily. A few minutes later I realized that I was doomed. I was [...]

I took a couple of clients to a professional hockey game on a Friday night. After a few beers I started to have stomach problems. Knowing how filthy the bathrooms were in this older arena I stopped drinking hoping that the problem would subside. After a while it became clear I would need to find [...]